work has been kicking my ass lately. also, the whole getting drunk afterwards on an empty stomach, then feeling like complete shit the next day. THEN hearing that someone from work asked the guy you’re talking to if that was true in a disgusted tone. nah, thats not cool. especially when you fucking pick up shifts for her lazy ass all the time, because im a nice person. wtf.

im having a hard time breathing, idk if thats a good sign.. maybe i should eat something, but i cant. i know i’ll just get sick.. aah what to do!?

this guy i’ve been talking to and i decided last night that we’re not ‘dating’ but we’re ‘exclusive.’ meaning, i dont talk to other guys, and he doesnt talk to other girls, and we hang out and “get to know the real you. and he’s seriously the best guy i’ve ever talked to.. he doesnt drink he doesnt do drugs and he didnt have sex… until last night. i was being sooo stupid and insensitive because i seduced him into having sex with me. we were just.. in the moment. and i knew he didnt want to do it, because he had said no prior to the actual sex, but i didnt listen to him. and i feel terrible. and im scared, because we didnt use a condom, so yaaaah.. idk this all really sucks, but he pulled out before.. i didnt even know we were going to do it! i was just messing around, and he was like, “nope.” like being a tease, but in a cute way. and we just.. did it. ughh idk how i let this happen. but i suppose that if i do get pregnant, then i’d want it to be with him.  but as far as everyone else knows, we did nothing. we only made out. which is what we usually do. ugh i really hope he doesnt hate me now or something.. i care about him so much.. more than any other guy i’ve ever been with as of right now, and if he hates me, or doesnt want to talk to me anymore becuase i freakin took his virginity, then it’ll freakin kill me. i wont know what to do, because he’s so perfect for me. i know we belong together. well.. at least i hope so.

ugh

idk

i hate this god damn situation.

i hope i hope i hope

it’s pretty pathetic when you eat a couple spoons of peanut butter and feel gross so you find yourself throwing it up, and then still trying to even after your stomach is already empty.

daisychainss:

taleeroe:

HUGH LAURIE
Left: You are a dedicated father who, with your wife, has just sat down to dinner with your 15-year-old daughter, who is defiantly announcing that she’s pregnant. Center: You are a fashion designer on the morning of your big runway show, realizing that nothing in the collection is ready or fabulous. Right: You are a blustering, pompous member of the British Parliament, giving a speech that is being broadcast on the BBC, and you’re thrilled at the sound of your own voice.

hugh laurie is majorly sexy. <3

make-me-pretty:

I don’t know about you, but personally, I’m sick and tired of seeing the usual tips and tricks on different weight loss pages. Well, I’ve done a lot of research, and here are some never-before-seen tips and tricks for weight loss. More to come soon! Enjoy!

1. Instead of getting on a scale, let an outfit be your guide to skinny. Break out a tiny little outfit and lose enough weight to fit into it, then lose more weight until that outfit becomes baggy on you.

2. Eat Breakfast! I can’t stress this enough! When you wake up, you’re body is in a fasting state, which means you are storing fat, thus gaining weight dressing! By eating breakfast, even a small one, you’re waking up your metabolism and actually losing weight.

3. Drink coffee (no more then 2 cups because it’s very dehydrating) with a small amount of honey and low fat milk.

4. Eat loads of vegetables and fruit to fill yourself up during every meal.

5. Wear a lacing corset to slim your waist.

6. Devour anything that helps you lose weight, for example, cough drops, hoodia or fiber.

7. Never eat past 6:00pm or 4 hours before you go to sleep.

8. Learn to fast

9. If you feel like eating watch a really gory horror movie.

10. Find out how your celebrity thinspiration lost weight or how he or she stays fit

11. Choose thinspiration with the same body type.

12. Do cardio for 30-60 minutes 6 days a week

13. Choose a cardio you love (dancing is my personal fave)

14. Make sure your workout challenges you

15. Change your workout weekly to confuse your muscles and rev up your metabolism

16. Learn how to workout via personal trainer, Youtube or DVD.

17. Workout twice a day instead of just once

18. Don’t be too hard on yourself. This usually only leads to failure.

19. Have faith that all your hard work will pay off if you don’t give up too soon.

20. Understand that you didn’t gain weight over night so you won’t lose weight over night

21. Get a workout buddy

22. If you have a craving for something, say chocolate, have a small portion of real chocolate instead of a bingeing on the low fat, low calorie stuff (which would probably add up to that same as the whole of the real chocolate anyways!)

23. Watch your thinspiration any chance you can

24. Studies have shown that people that eat all the same food gets board of eating the same foods thus eating less so eat the same food and bore your way to skinny!

25. Drink lots of H2O even when your not thirsty. Water helps your body burn more calories by preventing you from storing fat

26. Stop eating dairy, especially milk and buy soy milk and soy products instead

27. Since the body burns water all through the night, it’s a good idea to drink a glass before going to bed and one when you rise in the morning. In fact, if you want to wake up quickly, down a glass of ice water while brewing your morning coffee.

28. Do not try to buy cheap when it comes to your diet pill because you can’t save money by buying junk that does not work.

29. Eat a hardy low fat soup before the main dish while sipping water and having a salad without fattening salad

Age: 16
Height: 5’9
Weight: rather not say

Dress Size: 6 or 8 sometimes 4
Highest Weight: rather not say
Lowest Weight: 128
Goal Weight: 120

Favorite Diet Food:
cucumbers, baby carrots, broccoli

Favorite Binge Food:
spicey pretzels

Favorite Exercise:
swimming, zumba, crunches

Favorite Thinspo?
real people thinspo, celebrities are hard to copy

Where Do You Slip Up?
late at night and around my parents

When Did It Start?
fall 07

Does Anyone Know?
no

Do You Want Help?
no.

How Many Calories Do You Consume A Day?
not many, but today probably like 100

What Do You See When You Look In The Mirror?
fat and ugly. too tall, and not tall enough at the same time

Are You In A Relationship?
no.

Are You The Fat Or Thin One Out Of Your Friends?
fatttttttt

Are You Depressed?
some days

Ever Tried To Commit Suicide?
no

Ever Been To A Psychologist?
no

I AM -
[ ] anorexic
[ ] ednos
[x] bulimic
[ ] living off diet pills
[x] hungry
[x] thirsty
[ ] drinking something
[ ] Under 100lbs
[x] starving yourself
[ ] participating in a fast


PEOPLE -
[ ] ask if I’m anorexic/bulimic
[x] call me fat
[x] say I’m skinny
[x] say I’m ugly
[x] say I’m pretty
[x] spread rumors about me
[ ] force me to eat
[ ] say I eat too much
[ ] wish I’d eat more
[x] don’t know I’m anorexic/bulimic


I WISH -
[x] I was THIN
[x] I had a better body
[x] I didn’t have to eat
[x] I could control myself
[ ] I was under 110lbs
[x] I could avoid food
[x] I could hide what I am
[x] I wasn’t fat
[x] I was pretty
[ ] I could stop being ana/mia

I LOVE -
[ ] feeling hungry
[x] seeing a difference when fasting
[ ] shaking
[ ] being weak
[x] losing weight
[x] being anorexic/bulimic
[x] green tea
[x] diet pills
[x] being able to turn down food
[x] feeling good about myself

APPEARANCE
[ ] I am shorter than 5’4.
[x] I think I’m ugly sometimes.
[x] I have many scars.
[x] I tan easily.
[ ] I wish my hair was a different color.
[x] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[ ] I have a tattoo.
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[ ] I have/had braces.
[ ] I wear glasses.
[x] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100 safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
[x] I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger.
[ ] I have more than 2 piercings.
[ ] I have piercings in places besides my ears.
[x] I have freckles.

FAMILY
[x] I’ve sworn at my parents.
[ ] I’ve run away from home.
[ ] I’ve been kicked out of the house.
[x] My biological parents are together.
[ ] I have a sibling less than one year old.
[x] I want to have kids someday.
[ ] I’ve had children.
[ ] I’ve lost a child.

EMBARRASSMENT
[x] I’ve slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation.
[ ] Disney movies still make me cry.
[ ] I’ve peed from laughing.
[x] I’ve snorted while laughing.
[x] I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.
[x] I’ve glued my hand to something
[x] I’ve laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[ ] I’ve had my trousers rip in public.

RELATIONSHIPS
[x] I’m single
[ ] I’m in a relationship.
[ ] I’m engaged.
[ ] I’m married.
[x] I’ve gone on a blind date.
[ ] I’ve been the dumpee more than the dumper.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[x] I have a fear of abandonment.
[ ] I’ve cheated in a relationship.
[ ] I’ve gotten divorced
[x] I’ve had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back.
[ ] I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
[x] I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
[x] I’ve kept something from a past relationship.

SEXUALITY
[ ] I’ve had a crush on someone of the same sex.
[x] I’ve had a crush on a teacher.
[x] I am a cuddler.
[ ] I’ve been kissed in the rain.
[x] I’ve hugged a stranger.
[ ] I have kissed a stranger.

HONESTY
[x] I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t
[x] I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve snuck out of my house.
[x] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world.
[x] I’ve cheated while playing a game.
[x] I’ve cheated on a test.
[x] I’ve been suspended from school.

BAD TIMES
[x] I’ve consumed alcohol.
[ ] I regularly drink.
[ ] I can’t swallow pills.
[x] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem
[ ] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression.
[x] I shut others out when I’m upset.
[ ] I take anti-depressants.
[x] I’m anorexic or bulimic or have EDNOS.
[x] I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it.
[x] I’ve hurt myself on purpose.
[ ] I’m addicted to self harm.
[ ] I’ve woken up crying
[x] I’ve lost weight
[x] I’ve gained weight
[x] My weight holds me back
[x] Weight consumes me.
[ ] I’m at my thinnest
[x] I’m at my biggest
[ ] I’ve lost weight and kept it off
[x] I’ve lost weight but gained it back
[x] My weight affects my mood
[ ] I weigh myself daily
[x] I am jealous of everyone smaller than me
[x] I thrive on compliments
[x] I feel bigger than people who are my size
[ ] I feel happy when I’m hungry
[x] I get depressed after I eat
[x] I’ve skipped a meal
[x] I’ve thrown food away
[x] I’ve spit food out
[x] I’ve fasted
[x] I’ve taken diet pills
[x] I’ve used laxatives
[x] I’ve purged
[x] I exercise
[ ] I exercise so I can eat
[x] I work out secretly
[x] I work out daily
[x] I exercise to counteract eating
[ ] I’ve fainted from exhaustion

I’ve done:
[x] Weed
[x] Cigarettes
[x] Alcohol
[x] Diet pills
[x] Pain killers
[ ] Anti-depressants
[ ] Ecstasy
[ ] LSD
[ ] Mushrooms
[ ] Speed
[ ] Cocaine
[x] Other

[ ] I keep my eating habits a secret
[ ] I have a ED blog
[x] I look at thinspo
[x] I collect thinspo
[x] I condone pro-ana/mia sites

[x] I count calories
[x] I’ve had negative intake days
[x] I avoid food
[x] I hate food
[ ] I love food

[ ] I want to be this way
[x] I don’t want to be like this I don’t want to be fat
[x] I wish I could have more control
[x] Being thin is my top priority
[x] I don’t want to get better
[ ] I am in treatment

[x] I’m doing this for me
[x] I’m doing this for someone
[x] I’m doing this to prove myself